Okay, here it is: the inevitable rehashing and armchair-quarterbacking of both the game itself AND the “Super Ads”. I usually wouldn’t sink to “joining the herd” of sheeple blathering about the aftermath, whether crying about the poor game or lamely decrying commercial advertisements as “unworthy” of their time. Most years I just say the same thing: it’s always more hype than any game can live up to and commercials, no matter how cute, well-made, poorly-thought out, dazzling, mind-numbing, boring, or over-budget—they’re still just ads for products.
Yes, I realize that part of the fun (and hype) of the Super Bowl has long become the ads, with a kind of “what will they WOW us with this year?” approach. But both the game AND the advertisements don’t face infinite possibilities of outcomes. This isn’t space exploration or gene-splicing. It’s a football game, played by the same rules as every other football game, all year. There are no new players. Many times the teams have even met once already in the regular or preseason. How much grander can the game become?
And they are commercials. How much cuter can you make a puppy or the Budweiser Clydesdales?
(Hint: when they had them playing a football game two years in a row, I think that was an admission of sorts. “We’ve peaked.”)
Still, I get that the evolution of hype for the event has eclipsed the event itself. The game, ads, and hype have transcended “all a game can be”. So this year I was actually a bit more festive, deciding to ride the wave of hype a bit and enjoy the day’s festivities. I turned on the NFL Network early in the morning so that I could truly begin eating, drinking, (and yes, sleeping, football, with a late-morning nap, talking heads still babbling).
Imagine my surprise when the first “new” ad of any notoriety was for a dating site called “BlackPeopleMeet.com”. Now there are so many things wrong with this ad (and this site) that I have to summarize.
1. The ad takes place in a supermarket, where two attractive, single black people do meet. Uh, why do you need an online dating service if the supermarket works just fine?
2. If I were black, my first thought would be “And why do I need a special dating site to meet people? Why isn’t Match.com—or whichever is the most popular dating site—good enough for me? What, I’m black, so I must need a special place to find someone?” African-Americans have been struggling too long to be part of the mainstream, as anyone should be.
3. What about biracial couples? I guess white people aren’t welcome where “Black People Meet”, or black people who are interested in Asian-Americans. “That’s just wrong”, is BPM’s message, I guess.
4. What if Match.com were renamed “MatchYourRace.com”? Hmm. Methinks there would be much trouble in paradise.
I’m not even going to go through the whole “what if someone put up “White People Meet” site, because, frankly, that would be just as ridiculous as the site I saw advertised. I realize it’s probably not even Politically Correct for me to be complaining on behalf of members of another color. I don’t care. My brain and my heart (and my good sense) have no racial color, and none of them likes the ideas that such a site promotes.
The irony is you can’t even make an argument that a place like Match.com is prejudiced, because it’s the members who choose each other. So if I happen to be a white man and I come across a profile of a black woman who seems to match me very well, I connect. I guess on BlackPeopleMeet.com, well, black people meet black people. And that’s that.
I honestly was waiting for the first shot to be fired this morning over that advertisement. Imagine my yet further surprise when all the controversy was over a Coca-Cola ad where “America the Beautiful” was sung in eight different languages! (And as irony would further have it, this was aired on a day—and for a game—where Queen Latifah, a proud, beautiful black woman, delivered a chilling rendition of said song.)
I’m trying to understand the complaints of the racist, unAmerican fishsticks that have a problem with “America the Beautiful” sung in a host of different languages. Unless the bulk of them are Native-Americans, they need to shut the fish up. They’re no more indigenous than anyone else in these United States. In fact, the majority of these whack-jobs have ancestors who likely signed the books at Ellis Island, just like the rest of the tired and hungry.
And here’s something else, fishsticks: there are many children in other countries who SPEAK eight languages. I wish I did. And I certainly wish I lived in a country with a school system and curriculum where our children learned to speak three, four, or even eight languages.
All I heard all week long was the magnitude of the Super Bowl eclipsing so many other gigantic events and it being the pride and joy of the United States. Our chance to show the world we aren’t just a bunch of thick-necked bullies who hate anyone who doesn’t look like us, speak like us, or think like us. And you know what? We did a pretty good job. There were an awful lot of things to be proud about yesterday. I mentioned our Queen. And there was a little something we in this country like to call good-sportsmanship. I saw a lot of that, yesterday, too.
But, of course, this morning it was a deluge of the negative. Phillip Seymour Hoffman and his heroin overdose; fishstick numbskulls complaining about a commercial promoting the UNITED in United States; and Peyton Manning—the poor guy—destined to be crowned the greatest quarterback without enough crowns.
I wonder what Dan Marino has to say about that?
I’ll finish by saying I do think Manning had the best commercial yesterday—for him, anyway. I’m talking about his ad for Buick.
It was his only drive of the day.
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The blank page is dead…long live the blank page.
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Author known to use spontaneous satire, sarcasm, and unannounced injections of pith or witticisms which may not be suitable for humorless or otherwise jest-challenged individuals. (Witticisms not guaranteed to be witty, funny, comical, hilarious, clever, scintillating, whimsical, wise, endearing, keen, savvy, sagacious, penetrating, fanciful, or otherwise enjoyable. The Surgeon General has determined through laboratory testing that sarcasm can be dangerous, even in small amounts, and should not be ingested by those who are serious, somber, pensive, weighty, funereal, unsmiling, poker-faced, sober, or pregnant.) For those who enjoy and/or revel in the utterance of profanity, the author reserves the right to substitute “fish” for “fuck” without fear of repercussion, mental reservation, or purpose of evasion.
Hey, Rob et al.
Thanks for creating a forum to discuss some of this stuff. My wife Taliya and I are overseas at the moment, so I spent several days searching for SOMEplace online where I could stream the Super Bowl. I knew I wouldn’t be able to watch the commercials, because Fox sold the air time separately for the ads, but if I could at least watch the game, I’d be okay with seeing the same, old Chevrolet commercial during EVERY commercial break while all you guys get to see racist dating site ads.
I was indeed able to watch the game, but not the ads.
As for the game itself, I wasn’t sure what to expect. It seemed everyone expected a close game. The opening series safety was a charlie foxtrot, but I don’t think any of us expected it to steamroll into the avalanche of a charging rhino that it became, mixed metaphors and all.
I typically only want to see good, quality football. A good running game with lots of break-out runs all…the…way! And a good passing game with plenty of quick slants and a lot of deep routes and leaping one-handers into the end zone. The kind of stuff they showed in the hour-long Road to the Super Bowl pregame show. As long as it’s not a series of three-and-outs during a thoroughly flaccid ground-and-pound game, I’m happy.
What we got was an evisceration. Say what you want about the Seahawks-Cheathawks and Pete Caroll and his nefarious recruiting tactics at USC, the fact remains that they DESTROYED the Broncos. Even if you loathe the Seahawks, you must appreciate the routing. If Manning & Co. had pounded the Seahawks 48,000 to 9, what would our reactions be? Would we be happier about the game play? Would we all be strutting around saying, “Yep, I knew Manning would take it. But those commercials, whoa!”
And let us not dismiss the fabled half-time show. I’ll be the first to admit that sometimes I’m not thrilled with the act they get. But this year I enjoyed it. Not so much because I’m a Bruno Mars fan (though I’m a total RHCP geek), but because it was a GOOD show. It was a concert, with a kick ass light show. It wasn’t overdone. It wasn’t the opening ceremony of the Olympics. Bruno beat the shiznit out of the drums as he was brought to the stage, he sang and danced and sweated his ass off, and had some killer footwork Michael Jackson would have been proud of. The ensemble with RHCP was a lot of fun. Flea and Anthony Kiedis performed shirtless, which is normal for them, but it was freezing balls cold out there. Kiedis is also 51. How many guys that age are in such good shape?
My point is that I prefer to embrace and enjoy the Super Bowl (and the commercials I didn’t get to see so will now go sleuthing for on YouTube) and everything about it, and not focus on negativity. But rather, be thankful that we have a Super Bowl to enjoy, that we’re alive and healthy and have a roof over our heads and food on our plates. A lot of people around the world have far less. It’s really the height of ignorance and spoiledness to do anything other than sit back and enjoy it and be thankful.
Besides, if YOU (and by that I mean any one of us) were in charge of the NFL, the advertising, the Seahawks or Broncos organizations, etc, etc, what would YOU do? I’ve heard it said that American football is __THE__ single most complex sport on Earth, because of the number of players involved and simply the mathematical possibilities on any given play. “Red 28, blue gopher diamond, halfback thrust sideways whipped cream banana phone, 28 scout eagle Mississippi HERO sub on rye. On two. Ready…. break!” And everyone in the huddle understands what that means.
Thus, the difficulty of getting to the Super Bowl cannot be overstated. But it’s easy to be jaded and do nothing but piss and moan throughout all 4 quarters. People who complain all the time often have what’s known as a “negative dispositional attitude.” It’s something I work on constantly in myself, to meet life with a child’s wonder and a positive attitude and with excitement over what the day holds, rather than be a grumpy dick all the time. That’s no fun. Nor is it fun to be around. We’re all adults and we all have the choice to be happy or to be otherwise. That includes our perception of things like billion-dollar football games. Hope I didn’t piss you guys off (too much). And sorry I hijacked your blog again, Rob.
I don’t read anything in your reply that would piss anyone off (other than HIJACKING me again)! 😉
I totally agree that the event should simply be an event enjoyed from start to finish, world-wide. It’s really the follow-up/aftermath that has been so disconcerting. I mean I thought the particular ad I mentioned was a bit racist (in a weird way, against itself)—but other than that (and the fact that it’s always more fun for the game itself to be a close contest), I enjoyed the whole day.
And they do make some good commercials each year; I just think some people expect too much. That’s why the comment on this not being space exploration—there’s not an infinite limit on how entertaining a commercial can be made. Will they be better each year? Probably. Are they always better for the Super Bowl than “ordinary” commercial efforts? Yes, mostly. But some people act like they’ll only be impressed if, rather than a great halftime show by someone named Mars, the commercials are literally filmed on Mars.
BTW, I love metaphors (even mixed ones—sometimes especially mixed ones). Who am I kidding? You can hijack my blog any time. 🙂
For your consideration.
(I genuinely enjoyed these.)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OFLH8_Lfc74
I hadn’t seen the one where German engineers get their wings. THAT was a damn good commercial. 😀
I also enjoyed the Bud commercial, Chobani, and the Matrix/KIA commercial. Yet while Scarlett Johansson is inarguably one of the best leading ladies for a commercial, the writers completely dropped the ball with one of my pet peeve grammar FAILS: it’s less sugar, FEWER bottles. I know. How can I be that picky when it’s Scarlett Johansson? I don’t know; I just can. 😉
I solved the Super Bowl problem years ago. I don’t watch. To me, the Super Bowl has one good thing going for it: we’re two weeks away from pitchers and catchers reporting for another major league baseball season.
I was like that for a while. I mean, I love the NFL games, but I let my allegiance to the Cowboys cloud my desire to see “the big game” (yes, I was spoiled in the 90s and devastated every decade since). But now I do enjoy the day. Just not the hype. Or the aftermath. Okay, and it’s much better when the game is a tad closer (unless it’s a 52-17 drubbing by the ‘Boys). 😉
🙂