For those of you who are down on me bloggin’ so much, don’t worry—I’ve decided to back off to Friday Blogs only unless there’s something fairly important I want to say (like this). By the way, next week is Molly on Writing, a brilliant guest post by super-blogger Molly Greene you are not going to want to miss!
On to the subject of this blog. I have decided it’s time in the path to downsize my Twitter following. My “main” stream is completely useless and it’s getting too hard to keep adding (and deleting) people from my “Important Tweets” list. So I am not trying to be an egomaniac, and I know I am going to lose some followers doing this, which is fine (if you’re only following me because I’m following you, you’re a TWIT, and not in the social media vernacular).
The main point of this blog is one easy way to reach my friends, fellow writers, fans, etc. that if you wake up and suddenly notice I’m not following you anymore, don’t hate me, or panic, or ever worry in the slightest. Comment here or email me or tweet me and I will IMMEDIATELY add you back (unless I don’t have any idea who your psycho ass is).
What I did come up with, however, is a good list everyone should have for setting up their Twitter account, tweets you send, etc. This way readers do get something out of this short blog.
1. Don’t be an egg. I’m unfollowing all eggs and when I occasionally run across an egg friend I politely tell him or her to man up and put up a picture of SOMETHING. Seriously. Number one priority after creating account: lose the egg.
2. Use Twitcleaner.com once in a while. I had to abuse it a bit this week (taking no prisoners, so to speak). They list good friends and peers (including me) in some of their “questionable” categories—in my case because I tweet so much for others I get some flags for dupe tweets, too many @’s, etc. You really want to take some time with your report (Twitcleaner will run the report and then DM you when it’s ready). I used to only delete bots and people that hadn’t been on Twitter since Lucy was still humping Desi, but you get the point. You can easily target deadbeat accounts, etc. on there and keep your following list fairly clean. (I had to write this because I know some of you dolphins were swept up in my tuna nets—I just need YOU to tell me if it happened to your account).
3. Take a bath once in a while. Nah, just kidding on this one. Except Scott Morgan, but his punk ass never reads my blogs anyway. Fucking elitist snob.
In closing, seriously, hit me up if I unfollowed you and you think I need to hear what you have to say. Or if we’re just friends. Or by all means if you are a FAN of my books. I love hearing what my fans are thinking, so PLEASE HIT ME UP. I didn’t unfollow you on purpose. Well, I did, but it was only because it was easier to do mass, sweeping deletes and I want you back.
My fans are my lifeblood, you know that. I dedicated my second book to you. Yes, YOU.
Each singularly-awesome one of you.
The blank page is dead…long live the blank page.
Author known to use spontaneous satire, sarcasm, and unannounced injections of pith or witticisms which may not be suitable for humorless or otherwise jest-challenged individuals. (Witticisms not guaranteed to be witty, funny, comical, hilarious, clever, scintillating, whimsical, wise, endearing, keen, savvy, sagacious, penetrating, fanciful, or otherwise enjoyable. The Surgeon General has determined through laboratory testing that sarcasm can be dangerous, even in small amounts, and should not be ingested by those who are serious, somber, pensive, weighty, funereal, unsmiling, poker-faced, sober, or pregnant.)